lego excursion to school.

so im now in school. i wouldnt be here if i didnt use the computer yesterday. ive, deleted most of my contacts, those who i knew from the internet. i just find that its just making my contacts in my sim card full, so i deleted them. its really up to myself now. theres almost no one i can turn into. now they're gone, gone with the wind in just a click. but im still here, listening to myself. i think i really need to buck all the way up to the max. secondary three have been one of the best years i ever had but i wasnt really contentrating on my studies. ill soon be attending tutions in early december. im using berg's headphone.

currently tuning into: Pills - The Perishers

nothing like you and me, they perish long ago.

life is great? i dont believe it. not even you would believe it. oh i love friends. i dont need to mention them do i? i find myself a loner. i turn to myself and ended up doing things that you wouldnt want to know. i feel alot like hope lost in myself. all those courage to study, all gone. ive been slacking when its near the end of the year when examinations are coming. i wonder why is this attitude in me is behaving like this now when theres may march jan and feb. its like october now and it sucks. siting on the chair doing examination paper. i want to sleep. even if im doing the paper, im doing it without sincere without heart. and without guts to put in effort to. its like ive lost something. like a kidney in me not functioning. ive got my last day for art and im not doing anything. why am i not scared of the day. it seems like its coming to an end. its all within me, that thick layer of skin like swine.

ive been waiting for this day.
the day when ill get what i want.
to get me sick, maybe really sick.
so they'll place me on the hospital bed.
with many people looking at me,
wondering that its their fault why im like this.
injured myself so i can regret and also love myself.
so everyone will love me.

raya feat school

d/o mr k.
my eldest sister, d/o mr k.
little sister and cousin

candid.

sexy

cute

was covering my pimpies

bored at home oh yeah im fat.

school have been (too)great. stayed back fr art yesterday. like all last min but completed yeah. then went back home. i got myself hungry. bought myself bigmac. eat alone, like a total loser. should have been out with kr but hes not free. ive got plans for 16oct but i want a backup plan in case. must have plan b. i dont care, i want boots for next year raya. i alr tell mommy a year earlier so she can standby th money ahahha. ill getting my haircut soon. one offical haircut from the hairdresser, wont be cutting it myself cos im tired. 23 oct please come fast, camp. size=4>ruzanna's birthday falls on 21 oct oi.